Chapter 17 – The battle continues

I did not feel like spreading naked pictures of my children. I also suspected that guaranteed false justifications and punishments, unconnected to “in the interest of child welfare”, awaited such actions. I did make an attempt to approach the last government social service worker on my children’s case, asking her for a meeting. She contacted me back and apologetically told me her new boss has refused her request to meet with parents?
The appeal in the divorce case was constantly being postponed and I continued to visit with my children at the supervision institution.
On such a day the staff psychologist and manager stopped me, saying they want to meet with me first before I can see my children. A complaint was made by a staff member, saying I endangered my child during a visit – the 6 year old child ran about 10m ahead of me on the sidewalk and stopped at a pedestrian crossing. Their staff member is complaining that I did not stop the child from running on the sidewalk and thus endangered the child.
I remembered this visit, because their staff member’s behaviour included hysterical screaming fits at me. To calm her down I tried explaining to her that my children, including the 6 year old running child, are aware of the fact that they need to stay on the sidewalk, as they walk to and from school twice every week day for the past few years and that he is perfectly fine. Huffing, she ignored me, rushing ahead of us and without stopping, crossed the street at a non-pedestrian crossing section. My eldest child was trying to keep up with her and I told him to stop. There was a car coming. This social worker did not care that a child was following her blindly, 10 paces behind, into the street and she did not look back. She stormed into their offices, while we were still waiting to cross the street. According to me, her shallow pretence of “child welfare endangerment concern” fell flat. Her pedestrian sense was more dangerous than that of a 6 year old child running on the sidewalk. With distorted exaggeration, because, smaller children are seen walking/running 10m apart from their parents on sidewalks in this country.
But now, in the meeting, the staff psychologist, with drama, wanted to know why my youngest child does not listen to me. Are these people brainless? They had taken the child away from me when he was two years old and strongly created the impression with my children that I am “ill” and that they should not listen to anything I say. What did they expect? I have been allowed by them to take my children out of their organisation’s 11m x 8m visitation room on average once every 4 months for the past 3 years. We hardly regularly walked together. After this they wanted to know why I did not run after the child. I told her the child stayed on the sidewalk and then waited at the pedestrian crossing, which was perfectly appropriate. They exaggeratedly repeated that “everyone is concerned these children are in danger in my care”. I am diagnosed and also “punished” in the “respected” country for being concerned that my children are in danger of the respected country’s chosen father’s care. But I clearly do not get the privilege to fear for my flesh and blood children’s lives from a parent. These people also added that they fear the children’s father will make a complaint.” I reminded them that they are talking about a father, who in reckless endangerment drove over his child – an incident these people were informed about and which was ignored by them.
“Yes, this father might make a complaint against us that his child was in danger of being driven over,” they insisted. This father wasn’t near us, no child was in danger or injured and their reasoning was so far removed from child welfare being completely egoistic that I started laughing, in irony, at them. Their “big problem” was that they feared my children were in danger of being driven over, on the sidewalk, by someone other than this father. This “pedophile” father, literally driving over a 4-year-old after recklessly and intentionally endangering children, was acceptable. While I am being “scolded” and “punished” for a 6-year-old running on the sidewalk. The manager asked me if I think this a joke. I told her the whole situation is absolutely crazy and ridiculous. And then, realising that they had wasted 10 minutes of my visitation time with my children, left their non-sensical “meeting” without another word. They did not care wasting our time. I prayed that if normal thinking, emotionally healthy people do exist in this “respected” country, I may encounter them in hordes.
I was then informed that the organisation’s manager gave instruction that I was not to exit their premises on public outings with my children. Our punishment? This lasted until I encountered a normal person during one visitation who agreed we can go on a public outing irregardless. Afterwards she told me she does not understand what is going on. She cannot and has never seen my “bad behaviour with my children”, of which some of their staff members speak of, and she will be putting it in her report. Then I encountered another normal person and she also, after an outing, told me she does not see anything of which some accuse me of either, and she is going to question it.
In the meantime, in the care of this father and his employees, and as if in some twisted gag, my children were allowed to take turns running across a 3 lane road in-front of the house without looking for cars, in what appeared to be a type of russian roulette game. But after this “encounter” real bitchy behaviour surfaced from some other staff at the supervised visitation place. E.g. Some would tell me that I am to wait in the waiting room for my children, not the visiting room where I have been waiting for 3 years; some ordered me that, while I wait once again in the visiting room, I am only allowed to talk on my phone while standing on their stairs, etc. A male staff member, I suspect “preferring” men, exhibited a domineering, aggressive and oppressing attitude towards me and also my children – once dragging my middle child away from me by his arm at the end of a visitation. In another incident he also physically picked up two of my children, restraining them in a process of preventing them from coming to me during a visitation, saying he “cannot allow small children to run”. The same man also aggressively started rushing my children to leave a visitation 10 minutes before it was over. He repeated that I am “late”, while hiding his watch arm behind his back when I ask him to look at the time, etc. Other staff did witness his behaviour, including the staff member who threw her hissy fit about a child running on the sidewalk. They stood by watching, while smirking. When I ask them what was going on, they turned in silence and walked away. Luckily the staff rotated and these control seeking, freakish abnormal people were not always on duty.
About a year and a half after my children told staff at the supervised visitation place that they are beaten for speaking to me at the house, I was also notified by the supervised visitation place that they had eventually managed to interview my children for this abuse. They told me that during this meeting no child complained of abuse at the hands of their father or anyone else. I suspected that these abusers had already stopped those beatings a year ago, after the children’s advocate contacted this father, nonchalantly asking him if the children were being beaten. He replied no and she was happy. When I asked my children if they are being beaten, they replied no. When I ask if they had been beaten the eldest says, “Yes, but not anymore”. Analysing this child abuse scenario it looks like this: The children’s advocate did not bother speaking to these children, her clients, about being beaten; the police delayed about seven months before interviewing the children on this abuse I reported; the supervised visitation institution took a year and a half to analyse the complaint.
I had several recordings of conversations with my children in which they detailed their physical and emotional abuse. Forcing a mother and her children to live in a situation of largely only being able to look at each other, as we did, was obviously emotional torture to us, and for all to see. As for the rest of my children’s abuse, my children were saying they only speak to me about it, because they feel too ashamed to tell anyone else. Insisting with them that they should speak out, was met with comments such as: “It is no use”; “you should tell them”; “we only get beaten harder”. My eldest child had arrived very angry at the supervised visitation place with a swollen and bruised earlobe, telling me, and on this occasion also the supervising staff member, that his father had twisted his ear shortly before the visit. I took a picture of his ear. I also had a recording of them describing their sexualised behaviour (sucking each other’s penises) towards each other. At the time I asked the children who had showed or told them to do this and the middle child said no-one. I then asked them if their father also does such things. The middle child, in an exaggerated and strange gleeful fashion, told me that his father does not do this, but would beat them hard if he finds them doing it. I had noticed that this child had developed an abnormal desire to protect his father’s interests. He considered his father to be a victim of me. Saying things like: “daddy says you want to put him in jail” or “daddy says he has to leave us to go work, because you use so much water”, etc.
His daddy knows well that if he qualifies for jail, he is very far away from it in the little “respectable” European country. It has a well gossiped about local incest culture, eerily, casually mentioned “pedophile pubs”, and a well established orgy culture. Although I’ve heard that when jail is unavoidable to keep up impressions, pedophiles are given preferential treatment to make the staying in jail very comfortable. This was according to a reliable source who volunteered at a jail 10 years ago and was stunned seeing this special “treatment” of the one jailed pedophile.
At home the nannies went from not recording me and not pushing my children around, to loudly and repetitively telling my children, “come, come, come”, while I was greeting my children when they returned from school etc. The treats and toys which I put outside at the bottom of the steps for my children were removed by the nanny or their father. My children were forbidden to pick it up from the stairs. When they did, they were ordered to hand it over and told, ”you know the rules”. My eldest child still displayed drastic personality changes, greeting me in the morning leaving for school and returning from school crouching behind walls and dustbins. Which is also what I found their father was doing with them – crouching behind walls and cars when they returned from school. Then jumping out to scare them. One day as I walked out to place the children’s treats on the stairs, I saw a crouching figure behind the neighbour’s wall to my left and realised it was this father. He continued crouching and crawling behind the wall as I walked down. I asked this 55 year old man what he is doing? He stood up, with his iPhone camera recording me. So I asked for his recording’s sake, why he is crawling around behind the neighbour’s 60cm high wall? Without replying he turned and walked further into the neighbour’s property. These small children arrived home a few minutes later, but with no-one opening the door for them they confusedly mauled around. I told them that the back door to their house is open and to go there. Also telling them that their father is hiding in their neighbour’s backyard. At least this time he would not get his enjoyment out of making them feel scared.
My children went to our native country for the easter holiday. Initially the children only told me that they are going away, but did not want to say where they are going. I sent emails to this father for my “Skype holiday” contact with them as usual and received no reply.
The following summer holiday my children went to nanny seven’s house in Italy for about a month and then to our native country for the remaining weeks. While the children were in Italy, this father was again mostly at home in the “respected” country.
The supervised visitation place which ordered me to relinquish my visitation with my children for this holiday, said this father assured them he will give me Skype contact with my children during this 2 month holiday and that replacement visits will also be done. During this holiday’s Skype conversations, this father’s “rules” for me changed again, to allowing video.
My children, (now ages 9, 8 and 6), spoke of being left alone to ride a small motorcycle, the smallest getting a big burn from the exhaust. The child showed happiness over getting burned and told me that he feels nothing. Their father also used his manipulation of, “If you behave and do exactly as I say, then I will give you…” control tactics on the children. His promises were always very enticing and continuously repeated over an extremely long period, during which he would also start continuously blaming someone for ruining his “promise” by not obeying his petty rules he sets. This holiday he promised them throughout the entire holiday that he will take them to a lion farm. While they repeatedly and excitingly talked about seeing these lions during several conversations, I knew the chances of them seeing a lion farm was zero to none. It was being waved around to control and elicit other behaviour from them. I also suspected their father wanted them to be disappointed. Wanted them to feel at fault for not “seeing” the lions. Which meant he would make up or produce any rule and use any misstep to put blame on them. During this holiday these children never saw the lions a half an hour’s drive away.
Over Skype my children also started telling me that they will now be living in our native country and not come back to the “respected” country. They repeated this several times. I asked about their toys. My eldest child replied, after looking to his father for the needed coaching, that his toys are on the way by boat. I realised that it was this father who is coaching these children. The “very honest and morally upstanding” father who teaches his children how to lie…
During our first visitation after they returned from holiday, my children spoke of catching, strangling to death and eating mongoose on the farm during their holiday. I was shocked and asked, “Who showed you this?” My eldest child walked away. My middle child then told me he saw a mother strangle her child on television. I told him he is lying. No television would show and teach a child such things, but their father, a war veteran, might. My smallest child started crying and begged me not to tell, saying he would need to go and live in another house if I tell. The disruptive effect the father’s behaviour and threats had on these children was obvious and I did not want to add to this. I comforted the child and told him that I would not tell anyone. I knew that they had noticed my upset response and they would not be telling anyone of it, or admit to it again. Later they continued only telling stories of how they fed these animals. Reporting this holiday “strangulation of animals” would again just make me look like a liar.
In the meantime I made contact with a local reporter regarding the “respected” country’s Social Service report. He interviewed several people in the respected country, including the institutions involved, during his investigations and prepared to publish an article on 10 November 2016.
On 9 November 2016 I received a letter from the supervised visitation institution. The letter, also copied to the Youth Court, read that they are no longer prepared to supervise visitations for me and my children. That they are a short term solution and that my visitations with my children are not court ordered to progress, as is normally done with other cases.
The newspaper article was published 10 November 2016 and discussed bias, abuse and harassment in the child welfare system in contradiction to the embodiment of child welfare. Extracts from the first Social Service report were quoted in the paper. I was told the article was also seen in parliament. But no goodness resulted from this article.
On 11 November 2016 I received a notice from the “respected” country’s Youth Court, that a hearing is scheduled for mid December 2016. This was the same court who had, according to my advocate, ignored her for about two years.
The children’s advocate requested an appointment with me. During this she had an attitude and asked, “How do we know that what you are saying is true.” I told her it is simple: If the “massacre of a pizza” (a story told by the father and quoted by a social service worker) can be believed by the court, then what I am saying can be treated as equally true by the court. Not replying to that, she kept asking me why I don’t move away from my children? She added in light of my children saying they are abused when speaking to me, why do I then not move away? At one point she started screaming at me that she is the children’s advocate and that she does not need to tell me what the children tell her – something I did not request. But I did then ask her, “as these children’s advocate, what are you going to do about how they have been endangered and neglected in your country?” Her screaming voice immediately changed into a pathetic tone, while she stated she feels helpless. I described the naked photos to the children’s advocate. She told me to send the images to her via email. When I told her that act would be a crime, she aggressively replied, “you don’t have proof of who took the pictures, so they are not worth mentioning.” “How are you going to prove child abuse?” she repeatedly asked. I told her they can start by examining this father’s deformed anus, which I suspect is a result of child abuse. Her reply was, “it is normal.”
My advocate was once again not reachable and replied to none of my messages, so I decided to write to the court myself. I handed in a detailed explanation of how my children were neglected by their system and how they have been emotionally, mentally and physically abused by this father and his employees. A CD was attached with their voice recordings I had made,where my children speak about incidents depicting this. I also handed in a video I discovered, which was taken when the eldest child was about 3 years old. In the video this “wrestling” father can be heard saying, “pinch”, while his hand pinches the child on his privates. He is also holding a spoon threatening to beat the child on his feet and bum. I also attached a video I recorded in my last month at the house. In the video this father behaves as if he is a zoo animal feeding on the youngest child. He stands on all fours and continuously presses his face all over the 2-year old boy’s body, while his other hand is also “busy” on the child. He dragged the child by an arm or leg, ensuring that the child is in a lying position in front of him, making it impossible for the child to get away from his “attentions”. This father makes strange grunting and snoring noises while doing this. After realising that I am recording him, this father is clearly seen to be thrown off balance? This video was taken after I reported child molestation and around the time this “I am not allowed to touch my children” father sobbed into the ears of an either dumb or evil social service worker. This video reminded me of the children telling me about this father’s “zoo”, which my small children had told me they are taken to without my knowledge. In this court document I also stated having found naked images of my children on a child’s camera.
The notice of the Youth Court hearing gave an evidence submission limit of 3 days before the trial, which I ensured I kept. In this hearing, the judge replied she is not happy with the fact that I record my children. I asked her why she would be upset with that, but she made no reply. Ironically the country’s authorities have liberally allowed me being recorded, even while standing in my private residence and simply greeting my children. It became very clear from the onset that this hearing in a children’s court was again not focussing on children’s welfare. The main aim was to get my children to say they don’t want to see me any longer. The school social service worker, who on a few occasions apparently spoke to my children, testified to how my children don’t speak about me at all. The children’s advocate spoke about how unnatural it is for these children to live with their mother upstairs from them. She babbled on that I am the one who should leave and go back to my native country and get a residence permit there if I want one. It was they who had, for the past 5 years, instigated this living scenario. While I, their “crazy” woman, was forced to choose between abandoning my children like a trash mother or live with earplugs so I would not go crazy with their torture of being able to only hear my children. What did it do to my children? The children’s advocate did state my children speak highly of me. I will not be speaking highly of her.
The judge, who spoke to my children for about 5 minutes, stated that the children want change, they don’t want their mother living upstairs from them. She also added that the children gave adult reasons, but that did not matter to her, while she added that parental alienation tactics against me is not taking place. My middle child had also told me I should leave, saying I cause trouble for them. The “trouble” was abuse and various other punishment from their father and his nannies for speaking to me. It was clear that the “I am called a pedophile who prefers little boys” father, could beat, pinch, slap, neglect, nearly kill, sexually assault and emotionally torture his children. These authorities would look the other way, or only at me if blame is needed. The judge enquired about my “mental health” treatment. I simply replied that financially I cannot afford treatment and got no further comment from her on it.
In this court I made a point to speak when I wanted. Again pleading for help for my suffering children and relaying their abuse I have heard. The judge commented that I speak too much.
A prosecutor, who was also in this court, then repeatedly screamed at me that there is no evidence of child abuse by this father. She then accused me, using witchcraft predictions, saying: “There is future evidence that you will be harmful to your children!” These authorities didn’t bother securing evidence for protecting my children’s lives during their child molestation “investigation”! They accepted fictitious gossip and hearsay as “evidence” to persecute me and my children, and now they want to conjure up “future evidence” against me!
The father started off his comments in court by saying that he does not want to return to our native country. Further saying, that even if the mother is a prostitute or a drug addict or an alcoholic his native country would still give the children to the mother. I casually interrupted him, saying, “I am none of those.” He then claimed he suffers psychologically and his welfare was at stake and how he is heading for financial ruin, because of me. The judge and this father’s advocate started a heated, screaming session in French. The translator stopped translating and appeared stunned into silence. My advocate refused to translate and the children’s advocate stood with a happy, smug smile on her face. Not once has this “Youth Court” embodied a court of law I used to envision. I started packing up to leave, which made their incessant screaming stop.
The written order resultant from this hearing, started by slandering me for the first 3 pages. They used quotes from the 5-year-old social service report, which was ridiculed in the news article a few weeks earlier on 10 November 2016. The validity of the content of this social service report was neither examined nor confirmed. For their attacks on me, I had not seen an inkling of viable evidence, but they trample my and my children’s human rights. But the judge commented in the order that this father’s “human rights need to be protected”. His human rights apparently encompassed the court dismissing the submitted CD’s content. This CD was sent back to me in the envelope with the written order. Resulting in it being off the court records.
This order also changed my visitation with my children, saying I can see my children under the supervision of a “neutral person, a nurse or someone like that, at my apartment twice a month for as long as the person can stay”. A strangely vague order, I thought? Then I received a letter from my usually silent advocate, stating I should provide her with the name of a person to supervise the visitations at my house.
A psychologist, who about seven years ago did our marriage counselling, came to mind as a supervisor. She agreed and I forwarded her professional details to my advocate.
My advocate, who was abnormally available, pushed me to start these visitations immediately. I give her a date two weeks away. She then forwarded a letter to this father’s advocate with the arrangements. In this was stated the first home visitation of 18 March 2017, and I included the psychologist or supervisory person’s qualifications. I heard nothing further.
On the first house visitation date, – which happened to be my eldest child’s birthday and for which occasion I prepared -, I realised that the main house was silent. I didn’t hear my children. Looking out of the window I saw the car was gone. I had forgotten that I was dealing with child stealing, scheming, lying hooligans. My supervising psychologist showed up as arranged and we waited. No child could be fetched for the visitation, because they were taken away from the house. This father then simply ignored my calls and messages.
I continued to arrange a person to supervise for a visit the following week Thursday. My youngest child’s birthday was the Saturday. Again preparing for the visit and again no children were presented. Blocking caller ID, I phoned this father. He picked up. He replied to my questions that my visitation has nothing to do with him, was not his decision to make and that he is not going to have a discussion about it since the court decide. Interesting attitude! Did a court order give this testimony described “nicest, kindest, most considerate” father the right to behave like this? When he created trash impressions of parental alienation to courts about me, with false statements such as: “Who am I, the father, to wish my son a happy birthday!” While he previously always has spoken to them on their birthdays when he was away from home, with no rules from me or him having to request a court to force me.
My advocate then notified me that the other party did not consider this psychologist to be court ordered “neutral”. She advised me to approach the police, making charges of non-presentation of children. The police officer refused to take a report, replying that the court order is too vague to act on, not seen before and abnormal. After delivering this comment of the police to my advocate, she again became a silent onlooker.
Finding another advocate proved difficult with responses such as, “the case is too far progressed for me to take it”; we do not take legal aid cases”; “I am too busy to take on another case”. I could also not afford to pay an advocate and was reliant on legal aid. For legal aid I needed to produce a residence permit to get the application’s documents. I am told I no longer qualified for a family residence permit, so for a work residence permit I need an income. With the stringent rules for a work permit I was last in the unemployment queue for obtaining work, or figuratively not even considered to be in the respected country.
Emotional torture via my children as some weapon, has always been the favoured torment technique. I found two more people to supervise visitations and drew up a schedule 6 weeks in advance, making arrangements for each week. An email with the visitation schedule was repeatedly sent out to this father, his advocate, my advocate and the school social service worker and also another person this father was copying on all his emails.
In these emails I repeatedly requested feedback from anyone. Several dates for visits went by without “feedback” or my children being presented. Armed with the ignored emails wherein I requested visitations, I then went to the police. Also taking documents to show the disregard of my human rights and the sly activities of this “youth court”. The police officer refused to accept a report, saying he first wants to call this father’s advocate to ensure they understood the language in the court order. The police officer also refused to take my report on the human rights violations. After this visit to the police on a Friday afternoon I received an email from this father on the Monday, in which he ordered he had arranged “a person” to supervise a visitation for 2 hours on the Thursday afternoon. “The person”, he wrote, “will come to my apartment with the children.”
On Thursday afternoon my children and “this person” showed up. My children summarily barged straight in the moment I opened the door and started looking around, scratching in everything. I left them to it for a while, directing “the person” in. My eldest child wanted to know where they will be sleeping. My middle child was opening every drawer and cupboard, while occupying himself with the contents. My smallest child wanted to know where his birthday present was. Amazingly, they remembered earthworms I had put in my handbag for their earth worm project almost a month ago, during our visit at the supervision place and wanted to see this project. The middle child started playing around with my guitar, which the children said they could hear me play when they were in the house downstairs. We eventually played soccer. All in all the visit went okay. I was expecting awkwardness, since these children had been cruelly forbidden for several years to come near me or my apartment on the same property we all lived on.
After this visit, my emails with the visitation schedule were again ignored.
The easter holiday started and I realised, – not hearing my children anymore – , that they had gone on holiday somewhere. This brought into play this “sane” father’s “Skype holiday” contact for the “mentally unstable mother”. I sent an email. Two emails and four days later I got a reply that I can speak to my children only after three days. My reply was that only the truly mentally unstable people would understand why I can speak to my children only after a week. This father made “holiday Skype” contact and the “rules” a big issue for us. Repeating that “arrangements have been made for 30 minutes twice a week”. I have never seen such a a court order for me. This father would cut off the conference Skype call the moment either 20 or 30 minutes have been reached. He forced us to obey him. But during this 2-week holiday he allowed that I speak to my children only once – irregardless of his own “rules” and “orders” of twice weekly.
When they returned from their holiday, this father again presented his harassing personality, pulling out his phone on every occasion to video record me. On a Saturday, he and my children were clearing their toys out of the garage. I occasionally, for brief moments, looked out of the window above them. My eldest child saw me and asked me to stay at the window, because he has something he wants to say to me. Then I saw what looked like blood on my smallest child’s face, so I asked him if he got hurt. The children laughed. My eldest child then showed me a bloody finger, whilst laughing. Thinking he is out of sight, I saw my middle child put fake halloween blood on his foot and he moved to below the window to show me. They all then told me that it was fake blood and thought their trick very amusing. Their father then discovered legos in a box containing throwaway stuff. In his deep angry voice he instructed them to redo all the boxes. I saw a submarine which I had bought for my middle child in one box and asked him if it is broken. He replied he cannot find the parts for it. I asked him if it has batteries in and he replied no. The next moment this father exploded at me in his deep, angry voice, screaming that I am disrupting the children. I knew he spoke utter nonsense and simply told him to stop screaming at me. He then angrily ordered the children to go inside the house. He gave a general instruction to them of: “Fetch the phone so I can phone the police for your mother”. After my struggles to make charges with the police to enforce my and my children’s rights given in a court order, I welcomed this opportunity. The police were still refusing to make a report for my frustrated and also non-existing visitations. This “I prefer little boys” man had such clout with police that he could get police running solely for me having left out a tub of strawberries for my children at a front door. Unfortunately no police showed up after his threats and my children also did not come out to “redo” the boxes.
I had a meeting with a representative from my native country’s Embassy and their Consul in this “respected” country. He relayed that they had no laws for the situation. He also implied that my native country should take the case over from them. He assured me that the police will not come to my apartment to enforce their eviction notice of 2014, but that they also will not issue me with any permit for their country – a life crippling effect. He added that if I leave their little country at any point, they will never allow me any entry again. In the latest court hearing the judge commented that “no-one is forcing me to abandon my children”. Yes, they did. At the very same time this same judge cancelled my children’s protection alert. All cold hearted, irrational treatment in favour of child abuse.
I continued to send out the visitation schedule to the usual list of people, getting no response. One of the people copied by this father in his emails was the head of the Ombudsman for Child Rights. I started copying him as well. Again with the help of a friend I approached the police. Again they refused to take a complaint at that time, stating their new law is that a certified translator must be present. This was then scheduled 2 weeks from that day. Again, after this next police visit, I received an “order” from this father that a visitation is scheduled with “a person” to supervise a 2 hour visitation .
During this visit I noticed my children’s avoiding and stocky behaviour towards this supervising person – who was the school social service worker. She exaggeratedly pointed the fruit and treats, which I give to my children every visit, out to the children. They ignored her. When she asked them a question, they basically ignored her?
This school social service worker and the organisation she belonged to organised a meeting with my independent psychologist, whom I had arranged as a supervisor for visitations, but where no children were made available for the two visits. Why? Had she not clearly already been rejected as an “un-neutral” supervising person, saying she had testified in court. After this meeting with them, arranged behind my back, my psychologist contacted me extremely upset over how she was attacked in this meeting. She relayed how this father screamed at her for reporting to court about his anger outbursts and accused her of having no ethics. Very funny, considering the type of man he knows he is! She said that several people present did not interrupt or stop him. She reported that this father relayed discrediting stories of me being violent and said the nannies are leaving, because they are afraid of me. Then this father’s next move was demanding her silence, saying he will only allow her to supervise visitations if she agrees not to report on anything the children may tell her during these visits. In her professional position she could not agree to this. She told me she was shocked that he would even ask her this. I was not surprised with his behaviour and requests considering his “pedophile” circumstances. No other “child welfare” person attending this meeting, had a problem with such a request from a 20 year “pedophile”, but supported his request for the silencing of children.
Nanny seven and eight were frequently absent and several other nannies came and went. Nanny seven had a foot cast and could barely walk with a ring. One replacement nanny smoked. Another replacement nanny was an ex-girlfriend of this father and also from our native country. He had previously implied to me that he considered her “unwell”, saying she continuously changed her name. At the time I had found it strange that all his ex girlfriends, according to him, was “mentally not well”. But, my psychologist informed me this ex girlfriend nanny was also present at this meeting. From none of these people a psychiatric evaluation was required to be involved with children. But then not even the “pedophile” father was required to have a psychiatric evaluation.
In the meantime the police finally took my report on how I was struggling to visit with my children. Again, I tried to also lay further charges for the human rights violations. The police officer replied that he has no time, was not told to take other reports and that I will have to make another appointment. I made another appointment and was then told that the violations took place too long ago. Who would have guessed that I and my children were currently suffering in the aftermath of human rights violations and which is still used to discriminate against me. This police officer, apparently practising prosecutor and judge as well, repeatedly said, “it’s too late”.
After having targeted my psychologist, the school social service worker phoned, saying she was again arranging meetings on behalf of this father. He now wanted meetings with all the other people I had obtained for supervising visits. Knowing about their meeting and behaviour towards my psychologist, I demanded their conditions and procedures. I brazenly told her I wanted the “prefer little boys” father’s demand of “don’t report abuse you might hear children speak of”, on paper. She confirmed that this demand was indeed made by the children’s father, while she tried to minimise it as a normal request, saying my psychologist replied she will consider it. I and my psychologist were shocked – there is nothing normal about that request. When I asked her why they would even have had the meeting with my “rejected” psychologist, she confusedly blabbered that my psychologist was not a “neutral” person as court ordered, because she has been involved and had testified in court. Then she added that she has been involved in this case for the past 5 years and was doing me a favour to supervise visits. The double standards. I started laughing and asked her if her involvement and testifying in court had made her a neutral person? This school social service worker who is “approved for supervising visitations” testified in court. She sat behind me and I did not bother looking at her when she spoke of how my children never speak about me. But then to supervise, she must have agreed to this father’s demand, to not report to authorities about anything the children might say.
I also requested information regarding my children’s school records and the professional information of the nannies. I was ignored. It also took them another month to simply arrange two meetings for the next supervising person. This time the meetings were held at this father’s house. I was told by these people that nothing was demanded from them, but that this father was “nice”. All of a sudden I had 4 visits scheduled in one month with everyone being “nice”. I knew this was for the benefit of negating the police report. Shortly after this, this school social service worker moved to another area. The new school social worker was a very young and inexperienced person. She wiped her feet on my living area carpet instead of the doormat and she chose a ukulele on the couch to sit on during a meeting.
There seemed to be many social service workers in this little respected country, which rates amongst the top 10 richest countries in the world. News reached me that the third social service worker, who did a report end 2013 on my children’s welfare, – who stayed overtime until 18:00 to talk to them and who was also the only governmental social worker who bothered speaking to my children in a child welfare investigation -, was fired. The department apparently brought trumped up charges against her and ensured her removal. I was also informed that she refused the sexual attention of the director of Social Service. She contacted the journalist who wrote the article about my situation, giving him more inside information about how the social service operate. This included tremendous human rights violations against people, arranged within this social service department with their “confidential” reports and “confidential” court hearings. She relayed that my case was only one of many other human rights violations.
This fired social service worker’s information raised more troubling questions about the previous social service reports in my case. These were intently directed at discrediting me by creating the impressions that I am crazy and their sole aim was moving attention away from child molestation. For example: In the second social service report written around May 2013, my advocate stated that the doctor who refused to examine my middle child for sodomy in March 2012, apparently told a social service worker that he perceived me as mentally unstable. My advocate added that it was also written in this report that the same was reported by the child psychologist, who refused to evaluate my children for sexualization in May 2012. She evaluated a 3-year- old child,- speaking a foreign language-, only for autism in about 20 minutes. Apparently she evaluated me at the same time as well and then stated she find me as suffering from mental illness. Judges were commenting dismissively on professional psychiatric evaluations of me. Which were done over several months for several hours, stating I suffer no psychiatric deviations. But no judge is found commenting or questioning these numerous ad hoc and trivial “diagnoses” in a social service report.
But no “witness“ in these social service reports was required to write their own statement, medical certificates or legally verify their testimonies. “Testifiers” did not even see their “testimonies” or the “confidential” reports, which were all done on hearsay. But no judge in a family or youth court requires proof of what is written in these “social service” documents. These were not courts by any measure of reality or in any legal sense.
This father and his nannies’ method of putting down the phone after I have asked to speak to my children, was still being practised. No child of mine had ever phoned me. They tell me they are told that they can only do that when they are 18-years-old. When I had taught my children how to phone their father by the age of 4, their father had a fit over the computer’s buttons getting “hurt”. In the past 6 years I had only spoken with my children for 10 minutes on the phone while they were at their home. That 10min conversation was allowed by this father and attached to a promise of “getting more” if I agree to act as if I don’t know my children when I see them outside the house. I chose to continue to greet my children as if I know them when I see them. They continued to train my children to behave in public as if they do not recognise their mother.
The summer holiday season started. This father, his seventh nanny and my children were driving around the neighbourhood, telling my children to “knock on doors” and “say goodbye” to neighbours. I was also a neighbour. My children were getting into the car. I walked up to them and said, “Say goodbye to your mother as well”. This father, behind the wheel, appeared angry, but relented. My youngest child was busy giving me a hug, when I noticed my eldest child trying to get out of the car, but it was made impossible for him, because this father made the car roll forward. Once again my child could be driven over. This father obviously did not care for that. I ordered him to stop the car, so my child could climb out. My middle child was annoyed that he had to wait for his hug and then refused to give me one. My eldest child hugged me and got back into the car.
I sent out the regular email for “holiday Skype contact” with my children. They had gone with the nanny seven to her family in their home country, Italy. This time I was given a cellular number of the nanny. Previously this was refused, because “the nannies are scared of me”. My children and I spoke twice in two weeks. All other calls were blocked, after which they came home for a week and then started packing the car for what appeared to be an aeroplane trip, which I assumed would be to our native country. Once again I went outside and told my children to say goodbye to their mother. I also took them ice cream. They wanted to show me shells they had picked up in Italy and asked permission from their father. They felt obliged to ask permission from him for everything. Interestingly enough, he agreed. My children and I sat on the stairs eating ice cream while they showed me all their things. But later I noticed this father was taking pictures of us, sitting together on the stairs. I presume he would show it to others with one of his “stories” to make himself look like a “nice” person. When three weeks before he nearly drove over another child in an effort to prevent the child from greeting his mother. He did notice that I had recorded that episode.
For the rest of this holiday my children were taken to our native country. Once again the “prefer little boys” father’s previously “ordered” 2 Skype calls a week contact was pure frustration. His latest game was enticing the children away from the conversation with promises of “events”. He also, one year after having promised to take them to see lions, then took them to see lions. My children were also taken to a mountain resort, where they mentioned people I’ve never heard of.
Upon my children’s return, my court ordered visitations became a nightmare to arrange. Astonishingly, two church going, ex teachers I had obtained for supervision started with oppressing behaviour. The one person kept repeating that I have to respect the schedule of the children – which was “very important” twice per week handball practice that started cutting away at my and my children’s twice per month visitation time. More demands followed, for example, saying, “when the children come through your door Thursday afternoons, they have to immediately sit down at the table and start on their home work. Toys shall be given later”. Homework, my children told me, was given on the Monday already, but was left for Thursday afternoons. This was also the situation at the visitation centre on Thursday afternoons, but no-one obsessively and oppressively insisted it takes priority over my time with my children. Another comment was that I “need to have respect for the nannies and cannot allow my children too much food during the visitation, because this father and his employees want the children to eat their dinner”. With everything they said, they added, “this father has to agree.” During a visit the one supervising person started screaming at my one child that “if he wants to be liked then he will do as he is told”. Then their demands escalated into, “we will not supervise visitations, unless you agree to punishing your children”. Which was, “we want time-out punishment”. (Time-out punishment is when you ignore your children and force them to ignore you.) In the 8 hours per month I struggle to spend with my children they now wanted to push me to ignore my children for periods in that time as well. When for the rest or the 744 hours in the month my children are forced to ignore me. I told these supervisors if they want to insist on such behaviour they may stop supervising visitations. They both then stopped their demands.
In this period I saw about 7 different people/nannies at various times staying in the house with my children. Only one exhibited normal human behaviour towards me and my children. One morning I heard the garage door open early, then I heard my children outside and went to the window, as usual, to say good morning to my children, tell them I love them and to wish them a good day. This unknown nanny also replied good morning. All the previous nannies either ignored me, recorded me, screamed “psycho” at me and trained my children to ignore me. I bitchily asked her if my children are now being trained to greet their mother. She simply replied, “yes”, which also surprised me, because humanity and direct truth were not characteristics of the nannies I had encountered. I told her my children were 10 minutes too early for the school-foot-bus. This nanny replied that she was told this was the time the children left for school. She added that these people were obsessed with time. This father was not obsessed with time. He fretted over time only to pressurise others or find an excuse to get angry. This nanny introduced herself and so did I. Having had the experience of nannies lying to the police about me, I still kept my distance. This nanny continually proved herself normal and humane. I did not hear her scream at my children. I did not hear my children crying while she was with them. My children were visibly more relaxed and clearly liked her. When she wished me well and told me she was not staying I was very disappointed. My children were as well.
The “pedophile” father’s ex-girlfriend who came and went twice, for a month at a time, could be heard screaming horribly at my children. She walked around with a blank face, but once they had entered the house and the garage door had closed behind her, she started screaming. Her tone of voice reminded me of my ex’s. During a visitation with my children she rang the door bell and then, standing right in my door, screamed at them over toys. I stood 3 meters away, watching her. She was not shaking with fear of me, “the mentally, violent and dangerous” mother. She showed no signs of acknowledging me, while standing at my door, nor showed signs of shame for her disrespect. I indicated to my child to close the door on her, which abruptly stopped her screaming. A short while later the door bell rang again. My children again eagerly ran to answer it and, thinking it was this screaming nanny again, I followed them. My ex was standing outside my door, ordering the children out of my apartment. This war veteran, who spread gossip stories of how he fears for his safety from his “mentally unstable” wife, also presented no fear standing at my door. He barked his, “come outside” demands at my smallest child, while standing only an arm length from me. Standing behind my child, I placed my hand on him. My ex, in rushed anger, pulled out his phone for the camera. I waited for him to get himself ready, then I stated clearly into his phone that it is my visitation time with my children, so why is he standing outside my door demanding my children to come out? He appeared not to know what to do next. Then he replied that he wanted to say good bye to them. My middle child told me he was going to “fly”. To which I lifted my hand from my smallest child and he “said goodbye”. This “I fear for my life from my wife” father could have said goodbye before the children’s visit. This man did not interrupt teachers at school to say “goodbye” to his children before going to the airport. He only interrupted the person he told his children’s teachers he was “petrified” of. Neither did he feel the need to say “goodbye” to his eldest child who was not at the door? During the visits after this one, my children strangely never again ran to open the door. They completely ignored the doorbell? I am guessing these 10, 9 and 7 year old boys are forbidden to open any doors at their house.
This father was not obtaining or scheduling visitation supervisors. He did demand a 2 week notification of a visit and then scheduled as much events on the arranged visitation days as he possibly could. The new school social service worker’s contribution was notifying me that there was now too much events on that day for a visit, saying: “A voluntary nature walk was scheduled, the children would rather go to that than visit with you”; “the children’s German lessons were scheduled on your visitation day, their education is important”; “your youngest child needs speech therapy, we’ve made the appointment on the agreed visitation day”; “handball practice is needed for that day’s schedule, two practices per week is voluntary”; “no, we are helpless to change any of this”.
I approached the respected country’s department of child education for help with supervising visitations, being told they have social service workers. A social service worker was appointed on the “case”. She and the new school social service worker came to my apartment. Having been given the “nurse to supervise” order of the judge, she exclaimed she had never seen such an abnormal order and that I would never find a nurse in the small “respected” country to supervise visitations. Apart from telling me that my children say they want to speak to no-one, their institution can resolve or do nothing about anything. She also added that the supervisory institution is not willing to take our visits again, because I live on the same property as my children, she said. I’ve lived on the same property as my children for 5 years while this institution supervised our visits, then having no problems.
I had appealed the divorce court’s order made mid 2015, on the grounds that the judge’s order was ludicrous – which was giving a hooligan father full control over my and my children’s visiting time. While ordaining that even nannies, who run to the police falsely claiming they are scared of me, can supervise visitations between me and my children for 1-2 hours per week, at the house. Two years later this divorce appeal was now being heard in court. But the Youth Court, – a different court -, had already changed my and my children’s visitations. Just nine months ago they ordered that I and my children can be supervised by “a neutral person like a nurse” at my apartment.
But this divorce appeal court judge proclaimed that according to her there was no reason for me to appeal the “give the hooligan father all rights” divorce order’s visitation arrangements. The judge falsely added that my psychologist, whom I had obtained to supervise visitation between me and my children, is in fact supervising visitations and that again I had no reason to complain. Really? In my reality my psychologist was insulted, verbally abused and then attempts were made to unethically bargain with her to negate children’s welfare. She sat at my house for two visitation meetings where no children were made available. She did then withdrew her offer of help, saying she is not “approved” of by this father. But instead of reprimanding or correcting this father’s behaviour, this divorce appeal judge again changed my visitation with my children, back to the supervisory institution. She also reduced my and my children’s time together with 50%. I ordered my advocate to appeal the reduction in time, deciding to continue my home visitations. Even though is was an incredible frustration to arrange it was more normal and allowed us more time.
Let’s recapitulate the respected country’s inconsistency with my and my children’s visitation. First, 7 May 2012, they gave me absolutely no rights or contact to my children I had solely been taking care of, then ages 2,3 and 5 years old. In January 2013, they decide I can see my children for 4 hours per week at the supervisory institution. The supervising institution only started visits 2 months after the order, allowing only 2 hours every 2 weeks and maintaining that for 2 years. They refused to obey the January 2013 court order and ignored my requests for increased visit time with dismissive attitudes. Then I show them their agreement with me, which states every week visitation. This made them suddenly changed my visitation to 2 hours every week – no court order was needed for this change in visitation. Then a divorce judge orders 1-2 hours per week under the full control of this father. I appeal, but all ignore the order anyway. Then the supervisory institution withdraws from our visitations, a day before a criticising article is published about the small “respected” country’s child welfare system. In a quick following court hearing my visitations are changed to 2 times a month, at my apartment, for as long as ”a nurse or someone like that, can stay”. This “pedophile” father ignores emails and frustrates visits, but all condone his behaviour. I complain about it and the divorce court orders me and my children back to the supervision institution, which is part of the criminal system of this respected country. Although I welcomed the security, this judge then also reduces the visitations I had at the institution, of 2 hours every week, back to only 2 hours every 2 weeks.
I am repeatedly told that this father has been given control, has control, and I should respect his control. His behaviour is ignored and placated by social service workers, Ombudsman for children’s right organisation, prosecutor’s office and court judges. Writing letters for a solution and help, also to the duchess of this “respected” country, had no effect.
All the while I can hear this father screaming at, and emotionally abusing these children. I heard my eldest child hysterically screaming, “No daddy!”, while the others cried. This father had virtually stopped working about two years ago, but still needed a “nanny” to work for him. The school social service worker kept telling me how busy this stay at home father and his full time nanny were. She used this lie as an excuse for condoning the frustrating behaviour when arranging my contact with my children. While my youngest child returned from vacation in our native country with a broken collarbone and the eldest had a 4 cm gash on the top of his head, no social service worker bothered with getting information. The school social service worker’s new mantra now was: “The children say they are ok and don’t need anyone to talk to.” These social service workers now “obeyed” children, ages 8 to 11 years old, and happily gave them what they asked for. But when these children were 2 to 5 years old, the social service’s mantra was: “Do not listen to children and do not give them what they ask for.” In both these extreme positions, to these social service workers it meant that they have to do nothing for children’s welfare.
The video of this father pinching a little boy’s privates was also sent to the police officer in our native country, with whom a case of indecent touching had been made, based on my mother, a witness, seeing this father with his hand in the child’s crotch. On seeing this crotch pinching video of this father, he declared that the video was taken outside of their jurisdiction. (The video was taken in the respected country.) He also added that there was “no evidence” – meaning no evidence inside their jurisdiction on child abuse.

Because I was encountering more trouble and again ignored emails, beginning 2018, in the process of trying to arrange visitation with my children, I again approached police. This time I had no problems arranging the appointment – I can only make a report with a translator present which they need to arrange. The police officer’s behaviour was also completely neutral and pleasant. The day after, I was wondering what else he can help with and remembered the naked pictures. Even if I did not know who took them, as the children’s advocate adamantly pointed out before, I needed a professional’s opinion and asked this police officer to obtain someone in that field. This respected country had different police departments you needed to go to with various claims. I waited, but he did not get back to me as promised. But I also knew I felt uncomfortable with showing the completely naked pictures. I then decided to sensor these pictures, as seen on the cover of magazines. Instead of just downloading the selected pictures my computer downloaded all of the camera’s pictures. While censoring the naked pictures I noticed my two eldest children were the ones in the pictures and in some pictures their hands are positioned in the exact same position, as if they are/had been coached on how to stand. The focus are also solely on their private parts, whether it be just the bum, penis or both. The pictures were taken in their father’s bedroom and on their father’s bed. Also included in the downloads were two pictures taken a half hour afterwards.The children are not posing, but are still naked and now standing on the interior house stairs. Another discovery was a black screen video taken an hour before the pictures. In the audio three voices can be distinguished, my smallest and middle children and this father, who is speaking in our native language. Since this father had so many people/nannies coming and going at the house it was possible to confirm that he was present. His conversation with his children is sickening. The recording transcription is as follows:

Youngest Child:
[Undecipherable, I suspect he is saying, “you can lick.”]

This father:
“Two penis-bum.”

Youngest Child:

Middle Child:
“No, not penis-bum.”

Youngest Child:
“Do you want to go again?
[Repeats ‘Kapow’].”

Middle Child:
“Penis-bum, [singing noise] penis-bum.”

Youngest Child:
“[undecipherable] go again… [Middle child’s name] do you see …

This father:

Youngest Child:
“[undecipherable] penis-bum. [laugh]”

Middle Child:
“[Laugh] [Youngest child’s name].”

This father:

Middle Child:
“[Youngest child’s name].
Look, I am making a photo of [Youngest child’s name].”

Youngest Child:
“Papa, papa will you…”

End of recording.

I emailed the censored pictures for professional opinions to two police officers I found online and who works outside the respected country in separate child protection units. Both replies indicated that the pictures are very concerning. One inspector also contacted the respected country.
After these replies I insisted on making a report at the police. Even being told that “the problem is you make many claims”, did not deter me – another complaint was justified.

Considering the unnatural behaviour of some of the respected country’s authorities, I decided not to hand in the original toy camera, it might “get lost” and afterwards “no evidence” will most likely be repeated. I kept the camera in a safe place and made the complaint with censored copies of the pictures. Also adding onto this CD the “prefer little boys” testimony of the friend of this father, the “wrestling” with little boys crotch grab video of this father.The “daddy is an animal who is eating little boys” video of this father. As well as the testimonies of my mother and her house doctor explaining the incident of seeing this father with his hand in the 2 year old (sleeping) boy’s diaper on the bed. As well as the newly found “penis-bum” voice recording of this “I am said to prefer little boys” father talking to these little boys.
I also sent censored pictures to the child psychologist at the independent child welfare organisation, which was involved several years back by this father in one of his eviction attempts of me. This child psychologist contacted the prosecutor’s office. According to her feedback, their response was that they know about the pictures. They then ordered her to delete everything I had sent her and told her to leave it, saying they will handle it. She told me she could do nothing and had no authority – as she had repeatedly told me many times before. This father has to instruct her to interview the children, since he was given control over them by the Youth/Family Court. The prosecutor’s office also did not want to involve her in interviewing these children, which was my aim. She then asked me to bring the toy camera, which contains these pictures, to her office. I told her she is welcome to come to my apartment for this. She has had meetings in my apartment before, but now she refused.

Unexpectedly I received a call from another social service worker at the respected country’s Office of child education. This Office’s previous social service worker told me they can do nothing, but this new man demanded a meeting. When I asked why, one of his comments were, “to find out how you are adapting to motherhood”!
In the meeting he continually told me he is only appointed “to monitor the children’s future evolution” and wants nothing to do with historic events or my “claims” against this father. While he also repeatedly asked me when will I be moving out of the apartment, which had nothing to do with “future evolution” of children, but rather this father’s assets.
After this meeting I emailed him the censored pictures and his response was that “he and his supervisor are wondering what these pictures are supposed to show or prove”. He added that every claim of mine had been dismissed by the authorities of the “respected” country already in 2016, including these pictures.

He and the school social service worker also wanted to come to my house for a meeting. They demanded that the divorce order of October 2017, which orders me back to the criminal supervising institution for my visitations with my children, be executed and that they will now make sure that I obey this order reducing my visitation time with 50%. It was almost a year after this order. I intentionally mentioned the pictures to which the one social worker declared that the pictures are “normal development for children in the respected country” and that I “should allow the children to develop normally”. He added that I was diagnosed with “delusional psychosis” and that my opinion, that the pictures are disturbing and depict homo-sexualised children, is unimportant and abnormal. He also commented that I should be worried that my children don’t say they don’t want to see me again. The chaos and unjustness in this “arranged” situation and my fear for my children’s lost “normality” were indeed driving me insane. Then of course I am having to deal with strange male and childless social service workers who, for example, bitchily ask me how motherhood is.

Boys ages 5-8 years old do not behave in this sexualised, also homo-sexualised, manner unless they have been manipulated, trained and exploited by an adult. This type of adult is “called a pedophile, who prefers little boys”. As is the respected country’s “trustworthy” father, whom they are promoting and supporting as a parent.
For legal and personal reasons the pictures of the children cannot be made public. As a result, the following drawings are a recreation of these pictures. The children’s “penis-bum” father, is replacing them. He is placed in the exact bodily positions of the posing children in the actual pictures, which were taken in his bedroom.


This father was moving the children to a newly constructed town house about 2 blocks away. I arrived home one afternoon to see the bed, on which the pictures were taken, outside. I contacted the local police to notify them that “the scene of the crime” was being moved and that if they have not investigated or taken pictures of the room that they would need to be quick. I was informed that the case is not at their department and the department who handles the case was closed at this hour.

During a visit with my children my middle child (9-years-old) asked me why I had “made their private matters public”. I told him it is not private anymore. His father was standing outside the front door and he quickly glanced over his shoulder at him. I got the impression his “show” was for his father and that he did not understand what he was saying. He continued walking inside and behaved normally throughout the visit. My eldest child (11-years-old) asked me why the police had come to his school. I asked him if they were at his school in their police uniforms and he replied no. After this visit, I could not find my cellular phones on which my children had played games. I sent an email to the person who supervised and tried phoning this father from my computer to see if the children had taken the phones with them – which one of my children had done before, but the nanny had sent it back to me. Nobody answered. I called the police, explaining the situation and asked them to come with me to this father’s new house. The officer also offered to try and phone the number, to which he got not reply. There was full access to my emails on these phones. This father had also shortly before his divorce deleted all my emails on the service provider’s database. He also kept all the computers, which held these emails, inaccessible to me. The police told me they could not accompany me to the house and that I needed to go on my own. I went and rang the door bell, but no one answered. I knocked as well, but no one answered. As I was walking up the road the blinds of the house’s back window was moving down. I climbed the fence, went and sat on my haunches, stopped the blinds and peered in to see this father and his nanny. I told them that I think the children took my phones with them after the visit and I need them back. They simply looked at me. I asked them if they are awake and repeated my statements. They still stood staring at me. So I let go of the blind, got up and walked away, all the way thinking of all the trouble of sorting out this issue of the missing phones. At home I happened to be in my bedroom and heard a vibrating noise. Searching around I found the phones at the back of my shoe-rack. It was the supervising person phoning to tell me she had put my phones in my shoe-rack and forgot to tell me she did it.

The summer holiday started and my children had told me they will be going to our native country. I wrote an email requesting their “crazy mother’s holiday Skype contact”. The school social service worker emailed me, saying: “In any case the call tomorrow will count as the first visit for the month of August, because you have already obtained your two visits for the month of July.” So the next ploy was that a 30 minute or less Skype call I have with my children will replace a several hours physical visit with my children. This order of hers was not in any court order. She added: “…but I think it must be a bit indulgent since all these last months you had more than hours of visits as provided for in the civil judgment of 11.10.17.” I was allowed one 30 min Skype call with my children who, on the Skype video, appeared to be at a foreign house in our native country. During the last visit with my children I was told by them that they would be staying at nanny three’s house in our native country. I assumed it was her residence. Two days after this Skype call I saw this father back in the respected country, as usual having left the children, so he is not being disturbed. He did join them only about a month later. This man was now completely ignoring my emails and had been doing so for several months. My children had also told me that he had blocked my number on his phone. But strangely, this time, my children were phoning me randomly 3 times during the rest of the holiday. The children were clearly ordered not to tell me where they are or where they are going.

I requested a written reply from the prosecutor’s office on the child sex media case I reported. In this letter I added the behaviour of the social service worker who called producing child pornography and these children’s sexual behaviour “normal development”, while he told me I am “mentally unstable having my opinion”. I then emailed the judge telling her that I consider this “respected” country to be a pedophile country. I added that this “normal development” statement and obvious favouritism shown towards this father, who spreads it is said that “he prefers little boys”, indicate this. I told her that she needed to correct me if I am wrong or correct the custody of the children. I received a letter stating that there will be no changes in me seeing my children under supervision. That is an answer.

My children came back from holiday and I was sent an email that this father proposes a visit at my house. The visit itself went well. But afterwards I asked the supervising person to tell this father to reset the gas heating, because I think it kicked out. She returned saying that he was extremely rude to her, replied that the heating and hot water will not be switched on for the winter and said that this will motivate me to move out of his apartment.

After this visit I received an email from the social service worker, saying this father now wants the “drop off and pick up” point for the children to be in the pharmacy’s parking in the main street of the town and not at my apartment as usual. I disagreed. There are road works blocking and diverting traffic, which would complicate it for the supervising persons. I proposed the school bus stop two houses down. The social service worker replied that a children’s school bus stop on the sidewalk is too dangerous for children that is why they want the meeting point at a parking area in the main road. I asked her why I have to tolerate these lies and she did not reply.

Initially this father had made a tremendous issue about him having to interview and approve the supervisors I get for supervising the visitations. “In the interest of the children’s welfare and for his peace of mind”, I was told. I knew this was a lie. It was demanded for control. He refused to allow those he did not interview, or did not approve of, to supervise visitations. Then he also started refusing to interview more people to supervise. The school social service worker supported him 100% and replied, “Mr. *** **** doesn’t want to meet other people, since according to the civil judgment of October 11, 2017 it is mentioned that visits should take place at the T***-P*** Service 2 hours per visit and twice a month.” This man still interviewed supervisors beginning of June 2018 and now, after discovering I had reported naked child pictures, he refused to interview anyone.

The school social service worker was now by email proposing one visitation date after the other, having been informed by me that the “approved” supervisors are not available. But then someone became available and this was not liked. The school social service worker and “handmaid” of the “prefer little boys” father sent me an email the day before the visit. It reads: “Mr *** ***** informed me that the children were summoned by the children’s lawyer on Thursday October 4th. The visit can not take place. Mr. *** **** is proposing this Saturday the 6th of October. Otherwise you have to see for next week. Thanks for your understanding.” Notice her word use of, “summoned”. I contacted the children’s advocate and told her to move her appointment to next week, since I had only one visit with my children in August (three weeks ago). I added that I had arranged this visit already the week before, can’t find a supervising person for the next week as they now proposed and that he is refusing to interview other people to allow them to supervise. She emailed back: “ I wasn’t aware of this appointment, but told M. *** **** now that I do think it is more important for you to see your children, than for me to meet them on 4 October.”

On 4 October waiting for my visitation to start at 13:15, the school social service worker phoned at 13:13. While not having replied back to emails about the disagreed children’s “pick-up” point new demand of this father, the school social service worker told me during this call that I need to go to the parking across the pharmacy to pick up my children. I told her she had not replied back to the emails in which I stated I did not agree with this. She lied and said she did. Basically to visit with my children I had no choice, but to be messed around with by these freaks – the hypocrites who claim to be consistent with routines and schedules. I told her she better tell this father to wait there, because it might take us, me and the supervising person, 10 min to get there. But he was not there when we got there and no telephone number could be reached. We started walking back to the apartment, through the roadworks. About halfway I happened to glance back and saw my children at the bottom of the street walking towards this new “pick-up” point. So I turned and ran back. He only brought the children to his arranged “pick-up point at 13:30.

During visitations my children behaved aggressively, beating each other and anyone in the house, who will not do what they want them to do or give them what they want. They also projected their own bad behaviour onto someone else. One child simply walks to another, grabs him, pins him between his legs, like his father does during his wrestling games, and starts to beat him, while falsely saying that brother had just beaten him. Or while falsely telling me how his brother is hurting him, he will rapidly slap his falsely accused brother on the head, smiling. They will also hide things, telling me that what I had told them is there, is not there. They put on a fake martyr or victim act. When confronted with the truth, they either project their behaviour onto someone else, lie or minimise their behaviour, like their father does. This behaviour became predominant in the privacy of the house.

My advocate had told me, two months ago, that she will phone the notary appointed by court to divide marital assets. Saying she will find out why I have not heard from this notary, while adding, “there are no assets to divide”. I contacted this notary and found out that my advocate had never officially notified the notary of being appointed in the court order. Neither did my ex’s advocate. The secretary of the notary also told me they could not accept their appointment in this court order, on notification from me. They can only accept their appointment in a court order, after official notification from my advocate. As for the accrual marital contract, my now ex husband had at that time insisted on this contract. He had sent me a copy of a friend’s contract. He had arranged for the same advocate named on the friend’s contract, for our contract and he put a net balance of NIL for his assets. Now my advocate was representing and protecting him by not officially notifying the notary of being court appointed. What else had she done in his favour, while she fraudulently pretended to represent me and my children’s interests? I sent her an email notifying her and asked her what she is doing. She did not reply? I contacted the police for advice and asked them if this would be considered embezzlement or fraud. I was told that it is not a crime, but a civil matter for the Bar. I reported all the advocates involved to the Bar.

While these people are purposefully blocking court procedures, I receive another notice for a court hearing made by this father. It resembled a previous court application made by this father around mid 2014. In this is a request for “€3000 per month since 2012 for my stay in the apartment”; that I be “evicted without right or title”. The motivation behind all this must be a prenuptial marital contract in which “NIL” meant he had included all his assets into the marriage, including the building in which I was living, making me half owner according to this contract. The only way, under our native country’s marital laws by which he could negate the contract, was to literally drive me insane or to prove me a habitual criminal.

On that note: I received a call from the local police station in which this ex made a complaint that I broke his blind when I came to that home looking for my mobile phones. This reminded me of all the times he had broken or burned things on purpose to project it onto me. There was no proof that I broke it, but theoretically and very ironically, by his own strange marital arrangements, half the blind might be mine.